Bombers Repeat in Powerful Fashion
BY SPARKY CHALMERS
By definition the word juggernaut is used to describe a literal or metaphorical force regarded as unstoppable. Following a 26-19 victory over rival Corporate Accounting in the Pearson Softball Championship, it’s safe to say B&E is the resident juggernaut of Park Ridge.
The Bombers have rolled through the past three summers blasting monster home runs and celebrating to the sweet sounds of the boombox, but a familiar foe has always stood in the way. Corporate Accounting defeated the heavily favored Bombers in the 2008 Championship and left an indelible mark in each B&E heart. Until yesterday, Corporate Accounting had rolled off five straight victories against a team that stood 23-1 against the rest of the league.
“There couldn’t have been a more fitting ending to a great season,” Captain Patrice Jones said. “They are a really great team. They have good talent, play smart, and limit their mistakes. If you are going to beat them, you are going to have to really beat them.”
Wise words from P90 Jones indeed because the Bombers decided to not leave this one to chance. They decided after five straight losses it was time to flex some muscle and dig in for a severe bludgeoning.
Patrice Jones, Ian Gold, and Michael Barbara had back-to-back-to-back homers in the first inning. Then Patrice Jones, Ian Gold, and Michael Barbara had back-to-back-to-back homers in the second inning. The impact blindsided a Corporate Accounting team that is used to playing with a lead and not fetching balls out of the woods—back-to-back-to-back times.
“It’s not a secret, they are our rivals,” pitcher Ian Gold said. “Even though we were the defending champions, beating Corporate Accounting validates the title.”
Gold won the final boombox award of the year, smashing four home runs over the left field wall and going 5-for-5 at the plate and finishing with eight RBI. Patrice Jones added another moon-shot to finish with three blasts on the day (nine for the team if you’ve got good math).
The Bomber offense was relentless, showing evidence of how it earned the nickname.
Full of big league chew, the beautiful-nightmare trio of Janine Lucas, Elisabeth Scarpa, and Kim Lovato continued their playoff dominance and were dangerous weapons at the plate.
Even after getting hit with a ball in three straight playoff games, getting ran over by a Mack Truck at second base and overdosing on sugar—the trio persevered and earned the chance to drink from the cup.
“So we have a couple bruises,” Lovato said. “For the next 10 months we are the champions, there is nothing anybody can do to change that.”
Speaking of Mack’s, Mack Patterson stepped in and played the best softball of his three year career in the playoffs. The strong-armed lefty closed out a blanket of an outfield and found his Ryan Howard stroke at the right time.
Jason Calcano and Eric Svendsen not only shined on defense but used their ludicrous speed on the bases to tack on runs in the blink of an eye.
Despite looking like Orlando Bloom on steroids, James Heine used opposite field contact to leg out extra base hits. And although Usain Bolt to Calcano and Svendsen’s Secretariat, Heine is also very fast on the bases.
“We work hard in the off-season,” Eric Svendsen said. “Sabella isn’t afraid to fine us if we come to camp out of shape. You have to exercise and eat right, the miles on the treadmill and the steady diet of Chicken Fiesta finally paid off.”
And last, but not least, Tim Galligan is a rock. Through the entire season when the going got tough, the Bombers could always count on their burly first-baseman. Nicknamed the North Star because of his consistency, Galligan is the proverbial first to arrive and last to leave.
Corporate Accounting tried to catch its collective breath to rally—but a crisp defensive effort and a constant attack forced them to stare up at a progressively greater deficit.
The no. 1 seed in the playoffs were shell-shocked until the last inning where they attempted to come back from a 26-8 deficit—and valiant as it was, the hole was too deep to climb out of.
“Whether this was your third Bomber year or your first, beating Corporate Accounting in the last game of the year, you know what that Championship meant,” Calcano said.
Friday, August 13, 2010
Thursday, August 12, 2010
We Goin to The Ship!
Wave of Emotion Carries Bombers in Semifinals
BY SPARKY CHALMERS
For unexplained reasons, B&E was flatter than monthly birthday party singing voices (excluding Elena, of course). The defending champions’ searched for life and found it in the form of an uncanny big play, a well-timed cheer, and an emotional pep talk. Afterwards the Bombers found their mojo and rallied to a 15-9 victory over Health and Careers in Park Ridge.
The 10 in the field weren’t smiling. The 10 in the dugout weren’t cheering the one at the plate; and it didn’t add up. After all, this was the semifinals and a golden ticket to square off with Corporate Accounting in the Pearson Softball Championship—well, at least that’s what right-fielder Elisabeth Scarpa was thinking anyway.
It was the bottom of the third inning and B&E was staring up at three-run deficit. With one out and a runner on third, H&C hit a long fly ball to left-field and the runner tagged up to score. Eric Svendsen caught the fly and unleashed a rocket of a throw at the plate where pitcher Ian Gold was covering. Gold jumped up and grabbed the throw and pinned it down on the runner before H&C could tack on more runs.
“We just got the awesome play we needed,” Scarpa said. “But we still needed something else. I said to Patrice (Jones), ‘We need to get going, we need a pep talk,’ and he obliged in a big way.”
Jones brought the entire team together and delivered a Rockne-type effort. And even after jeers from opposing pitcher Ray Constantine, the Bombers were hyped and ready to deliver.
Gold led off the inning with a home run.
Michael Barbara followed immediately with a home run of his own.
And before the top of the 4th inning concluded the Bombers had a lead they wouldn’t relinquish.
“Everybody started having fun and that coincided with consistent hits and big plays in the field,” catcher Janine Lucas said. “Once we captured the momentum we made sure to keep our concentration and energy up.”
Lucas called a tight game from behind the plate and went 2-for-3 at the plate (and 2-for-2 in getting hit with hard-thrown balls in the playoffs).
Despite continued threats from opposing Captain Jackie Zupic to chew the Bombers up and spit them out, B&E continued to tack on runs courtesy of hard hits and hustle on the bases. Kim Lovato and James Heine finished a combined 7-for-8 in the middle of the lineup and continuously advanced runners, putting pressure on the defense.
Meanwhile, the Bombers defense played Little Rascals and Stymied Health and Careers at the plate. Motivated by a Sun Tzu quote from the Art of War, B&E strung together scoreless 4th, 5th and 6th innings.
“Tzu said ‘Invincibility lies in the defense,’ if we can close out that many innings I like our chances,” Svendsen said. “The league looks at us as being the team with the most power, but we’re also the team that gave up the least runs in the league.”
The Bombers were three outs from moving to the Championship but Health and Careers had their second consecutive walkoff-win in mind. They had come from behind against HSS to get to the semifinals, and they had no quit in mind. They threatened the entire inning, loading the bases with the top of the order looming. They even had James Heine make Gold field a ball and run home for a force out when none was available (and all the idiot had to do was throw to first and end the game).
The Bombers did get vindication when the next batter popped out to Gold at the mound, sending the team to the third straight Championship and a chance to repeat as Pearson League Champions.
Last year B&E had the sweet taste of total victory (and beer from a cheap bronze trophy)—and if the first two playoff games are any evidence, they are hungry as ever to do it all again.
BY SPARKY CHALMERS
For unexplained reasons, B&E was flatter than monthly birthday party singing voices (excluding Elena, of course). The defending champions’ searched for life and found it in the form of an uncanny big play, a well-timed cheer, and an emotional pep talk. Afterwards the Bombers found their mojo and rallied to a 15-9 victory over Health and Careers in Park Ridge.
The 10 in the field weren’t smiling. The 10 in the dugout weren’t cheering the one at the plate; and it didn’t add up. After all, this was the semifinals and a golden ticket to square off with Corporate Accounting in the Pearson Softball Championship—well, at least that’s what right-fielder Elisabeth Scarpa was thinking anyway.
It was the bottom of the third inning and B&E was staring up at three-run deficit. With one out and a runner on third, H&C hit a long fly ball to left-field and the runner tagged up to score. Eric Svendsen caught the fly and unleashed a rocket of a throw at the plate where pitcher Ian Gold was covering. Gold jumped up and grabbed the throw and pinned it down on the runner before H&C could tack on more runs.
“We just got the awesome play we needed,” Scarpa said. “But we still needed something else. I said to Patrice (Jones), ‘We need to get going, we need a pep talk,’ and he obliged in a big way.”
Jones brought the entire team together and delivered a Rockne-type effort. And even after jeers from opposing pitcher Ray Constantine, the Bombers were hyped and ready to deliver.
Gold led off the inning with a home run.
Michael Barbara followed immediately with a home run of his own.
And before the top of the 4th inning concluded the Bombers had a lead they wouldn’t relinquish.
“Everybody started having fun and that coincided with consistent hits and big plays in the field,” catcher Janine Lucas said. “Once we captured the momentum we made sure to keep our concentration and energy up.”
Lucas called a tight game from behind the plate and went 2-for-3 at the plate (and 2-for-2 in getting hit with hard-thrown balls in the playoffs).
Despite continued threats from opposing Captain Jackie Zupic to chew the Bombers up and spit them out, B&E continued to tack on runs courtesy of hard hits and hustle on the bases. Kim Lovato and James Heine finished a combined 7-for-8 in the middle of the lineup and continuously advanced runners, putting pressure on the defense.
Meanwhile, the Bombers defense played Little Rascals and Stymied Health and Careers at the plate. Motivated by a Sun Tzu quote from the Art of War, B&E strung together scoreless 4th, 5th and 6th innings.
“Tzu said ‘Invincibility lies in the defense,’ if we can close out that many innings I like our chances,” Svendsen said. “The league looks at us as being the team with the most power, but we’re also the team that gave up the least runs in the league.”
The Bombers were three outs from moving to the Championship but Health and Careers had their second consecutive walkoff-win in mind. They had come from behind against HSS to get to the semifinals, and they had no quit in mind. They threatened the entire inning, loading the bases with the top of the order looming. They even had James Heine make Gold field a ball and run home for a force out when none was available (and all the idiot had to do was throw to first and end the game).
The Bombers did get vindication when the next batter popped out to Gold at the mound, sending the team to the third straight Championship and a chance to repeat as Pearson League Champions.
Last year B&E had the sweet taste of total victory (and beer from a cheap bronze trophy)—and if the first two playoff games are any evidence, they are hungry as ever to do it all again.
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
Bombers Survive and Advance, 19-12
BY SPARKY CHALMERS
Tension mounts in the late summer, football is about to start and it’s the Pearson Softball Playoffs. One loss and the season is done – one win, and rest up for a game the next day. But as grizzled defending champions, B&E fought off a ferocious attack from PT and earned a 19-12 victory yesterday in Ramsey.
The Bombers raced out to a 14-6 lead after four innings in large behalf to clutch hitting from the heart of the order. Jason Calcano set the tone early with a seeing-eye triple, Elisabeth Scarpa took a walk and then Patrice Jones hit one of his mammoth shots that disrupted traffic on a typically quiet suburban street.
“If you have to play Frogger to go and get the ball, it’s a home run,” Director of Baseball Operations Melissa Sabella said.
In later innings the Bombers would lean on their experience to grind out a pair of two-out rallies. With two outs already registered, Michael Barbara, Ian Gold (who was fighting off wicked heat exhaustion while trying to break a sweat record with the Guinness Book of World Records), Janine Lucas (who is receiving the purple heart for injuries earned in battle) and Brian Reilly dug in and produced.
“When the bases are empty sometimes there is more pressure to produce,” Reilly said following a single that brought in two runs. “When there are runners on second and third, all I need is to hit a solid line drive and we score twice.”
Reilly in particular fought off mean early pitches to place balls in the outfield that scored critical runs.
Heading into the top of the fifth inning, B&E assumed that a strong half inning of defense would earn them a mercy rule and get them to the bar before happy hour ended. Instead, strong hitting from PT brought them back from the jaws of defeat. New life sprung into the underdog team and they started to smell an upset three years in the making.
“The series between us and PT has been one-sided up to this point,” Captain Patrice Jones said. “But all a team like that needs is one spark and they become very dangerous.”
When the Bombers believed they would be heading home, they were caught in the middle of a two-run game heading into the last innings couple innings.
In defending champion fashion they tacked on insurance runs. Melinda Haggerty worked on her cardio after a Jason Calcano inside-the-park homer. And James Heine was kind enough to wake up pitcher Ian Gold and allow him to drive in two additional runs.
B&E will continue the one-and-done format tonight against Health and Careers in Park Ridge at 5:30. Health and Careers beat the Bombers in their only meeting of the season.
Tension mounts in the late summer, football is about to start and it’s the Pearson Softball Playoffs. One loss and the season is done – one win, and rest up for a game the next day. But as grizzled defending champions, B&E fought off a ferocious attack from PT and earned a 19-12 victory yesterday in Ramsey.
The Bombers raced out to a 14-6 lead after four innings in large behalf to clutch hitting from the heart of the order. Jason Calcano set the tone early with a seeing-eye triple, Elisabeth Scarpa took a walk and then Patrice Jones hit one of his mammoth shots that disrupted traffic on a typically quiet suburban street.
“If you have to play Frogger to go and get the ball, it’s a home run,” Director of Baseball Operations Melissa Sabella said.
In later innings the Bombers would lean on their experience to grind out a pair of two-out rallies. With two outs already registered, Michael Barbara, Ian Gold (who was fighting off wicked heat exhaustion while trying to break a sweat record with the Guinness Book of World Records), Janine Lucas (who is receiving the purple heart for injuries earned in battle) and Brian Reilly dug in and produced.
“When the bases are empty sometimes there is more pressure to produce,” Reilly said following a single that brought in two runs. “When there are runners on second and third, all I need is to hit a solid line drive and we score twice.”
Reilly in particular fought off mean early pitches to place balls in the outfield that scored critical runs.
Heading into the top of the fifth inning, B&E assumed that a strong half inning of defense would earn them a mercy rule and get them to the bar before happy hour ended. Instead, strong hitting from PT brought them back from the jaws of defeat. New life sprung into the underdog team and they started to smell an upset three years in the making.
“The series between us and PT has been one-sided up to this point,” Captain Patrice Jones said. “But all a team like that needs is one spark and they become very dangerous.”
When the Bombers believed they would be heading home, they were caught in the middle of a two-run game heading into the last innings couple innings.
In defending champion fashion they tacked on insurance runs. Melinda Haggerty worked on her cardio after a Jason Calcano inside-the-park homer. And James Heine was kind enough to wake up pitcher Ian Gold and allow him to drive in two additional runs.
B&E will continue the one-and-done format tonight against Health and Careers in Park Ridge at 5:30. Health and Careers beat the Bombers in their only meeting of the season.
Tuesday, August 3, 2010
Bombers End Regular Season in Style
BY SPARKY CHALMERS
AE&S donned brand new athletic-imitation, flashy jerseys, but it was B&E that stole the spotlight yesterday in Park Ridge. In the final game of the regular season the Bombers put together a fantastic all-around effort and finished off last years’ runner up 22-4.
The game’s first few innings weren’t indicative of the blowout to be. In fact AE&S, held the Bombers (5-3) to a single run for the first three innings—but, while 22 runs looks impressive, it was the Bombers defense that earned the victory.
“Chispeamos realmente en el campo hoy y pienso que frustró eventual AE&S ese ellos couldn't consigue cualquier cosa lograda ofensivo,” shortstop and new Boombox Chain recipient Jason Calcano said. “Si jugamos la defensa como eso en las segundas fases seremos una salida resistente.”
And Calcano was right! The stifling defense frustrated a strong AE&S team. If you hold the Bomber lineup to four runs through four innings, and still find you’re trailing—its mucho deflating.
Deflating as a nail gun because the offense was coming. Michael Barbara hit a series of doubles and Steve Sartori celebrated his 31st birthday with clutch RBI and a towering homer to centerfield that even got a cheer from his toughest critics.
“Yeah Daddy!” yelled Ben Sartori. “Can I have a cupcake now?!” asked Zach Sartori.
Before Sartori’s shot to center, the Bomber offense got a Red Bull infustion from hits at the back of the order. Dan Sandin started a seven-run inning with a solid line drive to centerfield and was advanced by a similar shot from Brian Reilly. A collective cheer was heard from a neighborhood climbing wall.
“Performance Enhancing Drugs are a thing of the past, Performance Enhancing Hair-Clips are the wave of the future,” outfielder and Sandin’s stylist Melinda Haggerty said referring to a brief stretch where Sandin donated his wavy locks to beauty science.
Both Sandin and Reilly would come through to score on a RBI single to right field from Susan Osterlitz. It was a breakthrough performance from Osterlitz who took advantage of a pitcher who obviously didn’t know and didn’t learn that she likes to hit the ball to right field.
“Right field,” Osterlitz said with a karate chop motion and a point to the sky.
After stretching the lead to a ten-run rule into the 6th, the Bombers were challenged by AE&S.
“You want to quit?” they mocked.
The puzzled B&E team just took the field after technically winning and once again, shut down the Green and Yellow threat. With runners on first and second, the Bombers managed to get three straight put-outs at third base—and boy did James Heine look good standing on third catching the ball. Like Michelangelo’s David, but taller and more muscular, with hair gel, and a baseball glove, Heine sucked in those throws with an almost irresponsible flair.
“I just thank my lucky stars that we found the field,” Project Manager Kelly Loftus said. “I had to postpone my lease signing, and I wasn’t sure I’d get the chance to watch James stand on third. What a relief that was for Mary Kate, Claudia, and I.”
Following the extra inning, the Bombers once again continued to put runs on the board—another nine to be exact. Eric Svendsen not only created the power with his bat but with his wisdom. “Just hit a home run,” he said to his team. And for the most part it worked, as hard hits started pouring out of the dugout, sending runs around the bases.
Jason Calcano played pretty well too. He hit a couple homers or something.
Playoffs Are Here
Starting next week the Bombers can no longer afford a loss. B&E will not get a first round bye in the playoffs like the last two seasons and will need to defend their championship with a brutal stretch through a single elimination playoff. Schedules expected later this week.
AE&S donned brand new athletic-imitation, flashy jerseys, but it was B&E that stole the spotlight yesterday in Park Ridge. In the final game of the regular season the Bombers put together a fantastic all-around effort and finished off last years’ runner up 22-4.
The game’s first few innings weren’t indicative of the blowout to be. In fact AE&S, held the Bombers (5-3) to a single run for the first three innings—but, while 22 runs looks impressive, it was the Bombers defense that earned the victory.
“Chispeamos realmente en el campo hoy y pienso que frustró eventual AE&S ese ellos couldn't consigue cualquier cosa lograda ofensivo,” shortstop and new Boombox Chain recipient Jason Calcano said. “Si jugamos la defensa como eso en las segundas fases seremos una salida resistente.”
And Calcano was right! The stifling defense frustrated a strong AE&S team. If you hold the Bomber lineup to four runs through four innings, and still find you’re trailing—its mucho deflating.
Deflating as a nail gun because the offense was coming. Michael Barbara hit a series of doubles and Steve Sartori celebrated his 31st birthday with clutch RBI and a towering homer to centerfield that even got a cheer from his toughest critics.
“Yeah Daddy!” yelled Ben Sartori. “Can I have a cupcake now?!” asked Zach Sartori.
Before Sartori’s shot to center, the Bomber offense got a Red Bull infustion from hits at the back of the order. Dan Sandin started a seven-run inning with a solid line drive to centerfield and was advanced by a similar shot from Brian Reilly. A collective cheer was heard from a neighborhood climbing wall.
“Performance Enhancing Drugs are a thing of the past, Performance Enhancing Hair-Clips are the wave of the future,” outfielder and Sandin’s stylist Melinda Haggerty said referring to a brief stretch where Sandin donated his wavy locks to beauty science.
Both Sandin and Reilly would come through to score on a RBI single to right field from Susan Osterlitz. It was a breakthrough performance from Osterlitz who took advantage of a pitcher who obviously didn’t know and didn’t learn that she likes to hit the ball to right field.
“Right field,” Osterlitz said with a karate chop motion and a point to the sky.
After stretching the lead to a ten-run rule into the 6th, the Bombers were challenged by AE&S.
“You want to quit?” they mocked.
The puzzled B&E team just took the field after technically winning and once again, shut down the Green and Yellow threat. With runners on first and second, the Bombers managed to get three straight put-outs at third base—and boy did James Heine look good standing on third catching the ball. Like Michelangelo’s David, but taller and more muscular, with hair gel, and a baseball glove, Heine sucked in those throws with an almost irresponsible flair.
“I just thank my lucky stars that we found the field,” Project Manager Kelly Loftus said. “I had to postpone my lease signing, and I wasn’t sure I’d get the chance to watch James stand on third. What a relief that was for Mary Kate, Claudia, and I.”
Following the extra inning, the Bombers once again continued to put runs on the board—another nine to be exact. Eric Svendsen not only created the power with his bat but with his wisdom. “Just hit a home run,” he said to his team. And for the most part it worked, as hard hits started pouring out of the dugout, sending runs around the bases.
Jason Calcano played pretty well too. He hit a couple homers or something.
Playoffs Are Here
Starting next week the Bombers can no longer afford a loss. B&E will not get a first round bye in the playoffs like the last two seasons and will need to defend their championship with a brutal stretch through a single elimination playoff. Schedules expected later this week.
Thursday, July 15, 2010
Three Game Series Over, Thank God
Bombers Solve Riddles and Do Tricks
BY SPARKY CHALMERS
In the finale of a three day, three game series, the Bombers were left filling holes defensively and throughout the lineup. The replacements not only performed admirably, but had moments of brilliance in a 20-13 victory over AE&S yesterday in Park Ridge.
AE&S was playing only their second game of the season and, after losing their opening day, did everything in their power to try and beat the defending champion Bombers.
The last time AE&S played B&E a last inning comeback robbed them of the Pearson Cup—and there was certainly a sour taste leftover. AE&S dug deep into their resources and used their sweet new green and yellow jerseys to secure two Pearson League favorites, Josue Reyes and Scarface. Both talented players had already squared off with B&E as part of PT.
“I love playing against Josue Reyes,” pitcher Ian Gold said. “He is probably my favorite athletic figure (copyright 2011, Steve Sartori). Not only do you have to keep his speed and power in check, but you get to solve the riddles he presents throughout the game. I’ll give five dollars to the first person who can tell me what ‘We’re going to put numbers on all the houses’ could possibly mean?”
For B&E to offset an already talented AE&S team, with the two Pearson free agent ringers, they would need a few outstanding performances. And if you are scanning the team trying to find somebody to lean on, look no further than Michael “Boombox” Barbara. The 3rd floor intern had a two-run homer in the first inning, a two-run double in the third inning, a three-run homer in the fifth inning, and capped the day off with a two-run double to add insurance runs in the seventh.
“I would think that accounting for nearly half of 20 RBI’s is a pretty good day,” outfielder Dan Sandin said. “From the back of the lineup, when a hitter is that hot, you just want to get on and give him a chance to drive you in.”
The Bombers needed every run they could muster since they were flirting with danger on defense. For most of the night, it seemed AE&S had base-runners and were a big hit away from putting multiple runs on the board. A few times, it appeared that AE&S got that big hit but were robbed by Bomber defensemen. Steve Sartori robbed Scarface on the final out of the game, Barbara had some great plays from centerfield, and Susan Osterlitz made one of the craziest plays these Sparky eyes have ever seen.
For a couple years now, as your faithful beat writer, you’ve learned that I do not exaggerate. Well, let me tell you about this one. Scarface hit a ball right on the screws, a line drive right at Osterlitz, and that’s where the magic started.
“I thought we were going to lose Sue,” birthday girl Melinda Haggerty said.
“I also thought we were going to lose a Sue,” third baseman Brian Reilly said.
But Osterlitz took the ball off the palm of her glove and let it squirt out. Then she proceeded to slowly roll the still live ball up her forearm and across her shoulders. When Osterlitz didn’t think that degree of difficulty was high enough, she rolled it around the insides of her arms and across her upper chest region like a Harlem Globetrotter. She eventually stopped proving that she could juggle and finally cradled the ball between her barehand and the glove.
And when that happened, B&E should have known that karma was back on their side. And seriously, if Scarface hit a missile home run to right field, why would Josue yell “We’re going to put numbers on all the house.”
BY SPARKY CHALMERS
In the finale of a three day, three game series, the Bombers were left filling holes defensively and throughout the lineup. The replacements not only performed admirably, but had moments of brilliance in a 20-13 victory over AE&S yesterday in Park Ridge.
AE&S was playing only their second game of the season and, after losing their opening day, did everything in their power to try and beat the defending champion Bombers.
The last time AE&S played B&E a last inning comeback robbed them of the Pearson Cup—and there was certainly a sour taste leftover. AE&S dug deep into their resources and used their sweet new green and yellow jerseys to secure two Pearson League favorites, Josue Reyes and Scarface. Both talented players had already squared off with B&E as part of PT.
“I love playing against Josue Reyes,” pitcher Ian Gold said. “He is probably my favorite athletic figure (copyright 2011, Steve Sartori). Not only do you have to keep his speed and power in check, but you get to solve the riddles he presents throughout the game. I’ll give five dollars to the first person who can tell me what ‘We’re going to put numbers on all the houses’ could possibly mean?”
For B&E to offset an already talented AE&S team, with the two Pearson free agent ringers, they would need a few outstanding performances. And if you are scanning the team trying to find somebody to lean on, look no further than Michael “Boombox” Barbara. The 3rd floor intern had a two-run homer in the first inning, a two-run double in the third inning, a three-run homer in the fifth inning, and capped the day off with a two-run double to add insurance runs in the seventh.
“I would think that accounting for nearly half of 20 RBI’s is a pretty good day,” outfielder Dan Sandin said. “From the back of the lineup, when a hitter is that hot, you just want to get on and give him a chance to drive you in.”
The Bombers needed every run they could muster since they were flirting with danger on defense. For most of the night, it seemed AE&S had base-runners and were a big hit away from putting multiple runs on the board. A few times, it appeared that AE&S got that big hit but were robbed by Bomber defensemen. Steve Sartori robbed Scarface on the final out of the game, Barbara had some great plays from centerfield, and Susan Osterlitz made one of the craziest plays these Sparky eyes have ever seen.
For a couple years now, as your faithful beat writer, you’ve learned that I do not exaggerate. Well, let me tell you about this one. Scarface hit a ball right on the screws, a line drive right at Osterlitz, and that’s where the magic started.
“I thought we were going to lose Sue,” birthday girl Melinda Haggerty said.
“I also thought we were going to lose a Sue,” third baseman Brian Reilly said.
But Osterlitz took the ball off the palm of her glove and let it squirt out. Then she proceeded to slowly roll the still live ball up her forearm and across her shoulders. When Osterlitz didn’t think that degree of difficulty was high enough, she rolled it around the insides of her arms and across her upper chest region like a Harlem Globetrotter. She eventually stopped proving that she could juggle and finally cradled the ball between her barehand and the glove.
And when that happened, B&E should have known that karma was back on their side. And seriously, if Scarface hit a missile home run to right field, why would Josue yell “We’re going to put numbers on all the house.”
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
Blowout City
Defense Sparkles in Blowout Victory
BY SPARKY CHALMERS
“Bombers.” It’s emblazoned across the front of every B&E jersey. And nobody would argue that this team doesn't have the most Pearson league firepower—but no Bomber would tell you that Championships aren't built around defense.
B&E flashed leather in every nook and cranny of Woodcliff Lake Park Monday night and earned an 18-2 victory over HSS.
Jason Calcano led off the game with a home run but HSS managed to get through the rest of “Publishers Row,” allowing only one run. A feat that had yet to be accomplished...and confidence was sky high.
“It’s no secret that the big bats at the top of the order account for a lot of runs and awe-inspiring power,” right-fielder Elisabeth Scarpa said. “Leaving the top of the first-inning with only one run was surprising. And I got engaged last weekend.”
Surprised at the quick inning? Maybe. Ready to lock down the HSS offense? Yes.
B&E (3-1) worked a 1-2-3 inning sparked by a wonderful stab by Kim Lovato that kept HSS star Craig Campanell off the bases. The play at second, in particular, set the defensive tone for the rest of the game and earned Lovato the first “Platinum Boombox MVP Necklace” (Big thanks to our friends at Tiffany and Co. who were nice enough to donate the award)
“I just figured that no indie bands were playing in the area,” Lovato said. “And none of my friends were born in the month of July. And I already saw Toy Story 3. So I might as well show up and play softball.”
Good for the Bombers that all those stars aligned because the spark in the first was contagious and soon everyone was following the example. Per the usual, Jason Calcano played a fantastic shortstop (from now on, until further notification, just assume that Calcano played well at short). James Heine played the best third-base of his career and summoned his inner Brett Favre gunning (and I use this phrase loosely) down batters hustling to first.
The outfield also sparkled as Eric Svendsen and Michael Barbara chased down balls that lesser players would have let drop in for extra base hits.
“It’s very easy to pitch when everyone around you is playing well,” B&E Ace and reigning Cy Young award winner who has miraculously not yielded a walk this season Ian Gold said. “The other team has to be deflated, must seem like we have 14 people in the field.”
While the defense was shining, the offense kicked itself into gear. The Woodcliff Lake field features a much deeper wall than Park Ridge—and the Bomber offense showed its ability to adapt. Hitters that are used to teeing up balls into the left field forest were lining ropes into the field and digging out doubles. Baserunning became a premium and two-out RBIs added up until the HSS team was staring at an insurmountable deficit.
“The other team was souped that we only put one run up in the first but I had little doubt that we would reach our usual totals,” outfielder Mack Patterson said. “We’ve got some of the best hitters in the league and we always find someone to step up.”
Patterson stepped up at the back of the lineup and hit line drives through the infield for solid hits. The third year veteran drove in runners and set the table for “Publishers Row.”
B&E and USCG Meet For First Place
The Bombers are back in action tonight for the second game of a three-game set. They play host to familiar rivals USCG—the only team to defeat the Bombers this year. A win for B&E would move them into first place by way of runs scored. A large crowd is expected, so if you don’t come, you will be singled out for hating Pearson and your coworkers.
BY SPARKY CHALMERS
“Bombers.” It’s emblazoned across the front of every B&E jersey. And nobody would argue that this team doesn't have the most Pearson league firepower—but no Bomber would tell you that Championships aren't built around defense.
B&E flashed leather in every nook and cranny of Woodcliff Lake Park Monday night and earned an 18-2 victory over HSS.
Jason Calcano led off the game with a home run but HSS managed to get through the rest of “Publishers Row,” allowing only one run. A feat that had yet to be accomplished...and confidence was sky high.
“It’s no secret that the big bats at the top of the order account for a lot of runs and awe-inspiring power,” right-fielder Elisabeth Scarpa said. “Leaving the top of the first-inning with only one run was surprising. And I got engaged last weekend.”
Surprised at the quick inning? Maybe. Ready to lock down the HSS offense? Yes.
B&E (3-1) worked a 1-2-3 inning sparked by a wonderful stab by Kim Lovato that kept HSS star Craig Campanell off the bases. The play at second, in particular, set the defensive tone for the rest of the game and earned Lovato the first “Platinum Boombox MVP Necklace” (Big thanks to our friends at Tiffany and Co. who were nice enough to donate the award)
“I just figured that no indie bands were playing in the area,” Lovato said. “And none of my friends were born in the month of July. And I already saw Toy Story 3. So I might as well show up and play softball.”
Good for the Bombers that all those stars aligned because the spark in the first was contagious and soon everyone was following the example. Per the usual, Jason Calcano played a fantastic shortstop (from now on, until further notification, just assume that Calcano played well at short). James Heine played the best third-base of his career and summoned his inner Brett Favre gunning (and I use this phrase loosely) down batters hustling to first.
The outfield also sparkled as Eric Svendsen and Michael Barbara chased down balls that lesser players would have let drop in for extra base hits.
“It’s very easy to pitch when everyone around you is playing well,” B&E Ace and reigning Cy Young award winner who has miraculously not yielded a walk this season Ian Gold said. “The other team has to be deflated, must seem like we have 14 people in the field.”
While the defense was shining, the offense kicked itself into gear. The Woodcliff Lake field features a much deeper wall than Park Ridge—and the Bomber offense showed its ability to adapt. Hitters that are used to teeing up balls into the left field forest were lining ropes into the field and digging out doubles. Baserunning became a premium and two-out RBIs added up until the HSS team was staring at an insurmountable deficit.
“The other team was souped that we only put one run up in the first but I had little doubt that we would reach our usual totals,” outfielder Mack Patterson said. “We’ve got some of the best hitters in the league and we always find someone to step up.”
Patterson stepped up at the back of the lineup and hit line drives through the infield for solid hits. The third year veteran drove in runners and set the table for “Publishers Row.”
B&E and USCG Meet For First Place
The Bombers are back in action tonight for the second game of a three-game set. They play host to familiar rivals USCG—the only team to defeat the Bombers this year. A win for B&E would move them into first place by way of runs scored. A large crowd is expected, so if you don’t come, you will be singled out for hating Pearson and your coworkers.
Monday, July 12, 2010
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
Most Boring Game Ever
Music Rings Life into Bomber Lineup
BY SPARKY CHALMERS
Guest statistician Linda Albelli went through a full pens worth of ink Tuesday night in Park Ridge. A combination of Bomber bats and well placed balls resulted in a lot of runs – and I’m talking a ton. While fighting off the early stages of Carpal Tunnel, Albelli kept note of every run during a 31-6 victory over HR/Legal.
The Bombers surrendered two runs in the top of the first inning, and that was the last negative thing that happened for the day. Pop-ups found green and turned into doubles, ground balls hit gaps and turned races to first into races to home. It was just the kind of medicine B&E needed after the Barnum and Bailey’s 5th inning from Monday’s loss.
“After the loss to USCG it was nice to bounce back in a big way,” second basegirl Melinda Haggerty said. “After we got a few breaks we got our confidence back, and swung the bat with authority.”
Adding to the party was a huge boombox that echoed each Bomber’s theme music through Park Ridge. Apart from being 35-pounds of fun, the music seemed to relax the batting order and get B&E into a rhythm from the get go.
“When Jason (Calcano) went up to bat and we kick-started our music tradition it was pretty awesome,” second basegirl Susan Osterlitz said. “His music choice was very fitting and reminded me of my time at Mango’s in Miami.”
Calcano led the first inning off with a home-run over the left field fence. Four batters later Michael Barbara added a left-field blast of his own. And the merry-go-round known as the bases didn’t stop moving for a while. The first inning was the first of two innings that the Bombers batted around in.
“We got the snowball rolling downhill and it just kept getting bigger and harder to stop,” Michael Barbara said before being cut off by catcher Janeen Lucius who stated that interns don’t get quoted in the paper and get fined for using cliché analogies.
Every person (except Melinda Jensen and Sam Nicole) on the right side of the field had stats worthy of note. Mack Patterson had a grand slam through the middle of the field, James Heine swears he went 5-for-5, Haggerty reached base three times and Osterlitz hit a well placed ball into right field and ended up on third base.
And so on and so on.
The feel good story of the day was HR/Legal turning down the 10-run rule in the 5th inning and playing the game out until the end – and then joining the team out for post-game festivities. Willie Stargell once said “When they start the game, they don't yell, "Work ball." They say,"Play ball." HR/Legal in cooperation with a boombox full of tunes reminded us of that.
BY SPARKY CHALMERS
Guest statistician Linda Albelli went through a full pens worth of ink Tuesday night in Park Ridge. A combination of Bomber bats and well placed balls resulted in a lot of runs – and I’m talking a ton. While fighting off the early stages of Carpal Tunnel, Albelli kept note of every run during a 31-6 victory over HR/Legal.
The Bombers surrendered two runs in the top of the first inning, and that was the last negative thing that happened for the day. Pop-ups found green and turned into doubles, ground balls hit gaps and turned races to first into races to home. It was just the kind of medicine B&E needed after the Barnum and Bailey’s 5th inning from Monday’s loss.
“After the loss to USCG it was nice to bounce back in a big way,” second basegirl Melinda Haggerty said. “After we got a few breaks we got our confidence back, and swung the bat with authority.”
Adding to the party was a huge boombox that echoed each Bomber’s theme music through Park Ridge. Apart from being 35-pounds of fun, the music seemed to relax the batting order and get B&E into a rhythm from the get go.
“When Jason (Calcano) went up to bat and we kick-started our music tradition it was pretty awesome,” second basegirl Susan Osterlitz said. “His music choice was very fitting and reminded me of my time at Mango’s in Miami.”
Calcano led the first inning off with a home-run over the left field fence. Four batters later Michael Barbara added a left-field blast of his own. And the merry-go-round known as the bases didn’t stop moving for a while. The first inning was the first of two innings that the Bombers batted around in.
“We got the snowball rolling downhill and it just kept getting bigger and harder to stop,” Michael Barbara said before being cut off by catcher Janeen Lucius who stated that interns don’t get quoted in the paper and get fined for using cliché analogies.
Every person (except Melinda Jensen and Sam Nicole) on the right side of the field had stats worthy of note. Mack Patterson had a grand slam through the middle of the field, James Heine swears he went 5-for-5, Haggerty reached base three times and Osterlitz hit a well placed ball into right field and ended up on third base.
And so on and so on.
The feel good story of the day was HR/Legal turning down the 10-run rule in the 5th inning and playing the game out until the end – and then joining the team out for post-game festivities. Willie Stargell once said “When they start the game, they don't yell, "Work ball." They say,"Play ball." HR/Legal in cooperation with a boombox full of tunes reminded us of that.
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
I Post Losses Too
Bad Inning Dooms Bombers
BY SPARKY CHALMERS
PARK RIDGE, NJ: It was all too familiar for B&E (1-1) yesterday. When the mighty squad has fallen there have been a couple of constants in the equation. Their own mental lapses opened up room for their opposition’s big inning – and their opposition is usually USCG.
Yesterday was no different as B&E surrendered a 13 run inning in the bottom of the 5th and fell to USCG (2-0) 16-11.
The Bombers looked like themselves in the first inning, taking advantage of mistakes and driving in runs. They plated five runners in total, highlighted by a line-drive two run homer off the bat of Steve Sartori. Sartori had the only wall-clearing home run of the day.
They resembled like themselves in fact all the way until the bottom of the 5th - strolling into the half-frame with a 10-3 lead. The heart of the order went 11-15 in building the advantage and Elisabeth Scarpa and Eric Svendsen used their speed to cause havoc on the base-paths.
“The wheels really fell off there,” outfielder Mack Patterson said. “I don’t know if we got comfortable, or if it was a lack of concentration. But we should never watch 13 runs cross the plate in a game – let a lone one inning.”
Up until the point of destruction, the Bomber defense looked air tight. On a hot and humid day the outfield managed to play the ball in front of them and get the ball back in quickly. The infield was sound and exhibited the type of range that forces B&E fans to show up in droves. The highlight of the day – and maybe the year, was a catch at short by Jason Calcano.
With runners on second and third, USCG brought up one of their top RBI men. On the second pitch of the at bat he hit a missile in between third base and short. Or so he thought. Calcano used every ounce of his enyay to lay out to his right and snare the ball about 10 inches from the ground. Both teams stopped play to simply clap and remind their lower jaw to return back to normal.
“He is just an amazing shortstop,” his boss and Bomber third baseman James Heine said. “The plays he makes in the field really save our team, and make me proud. The fact that my leadership and guidance is creating such a player is a real credit to my leadership and guidance.”
The Bombers don’t have to wait long to shake off their loss to Corporate Accounting. The squad will be back in action this afternoon against HR and Legal in Park Ridge.
BY SPARKY CHALMERS
PARK RIDGE, NJ: It was all too familiar for B&E (1-1) yesterday. When the mighty squad has fallen there have been a couple of constants in the equation. Their own mental lapses opened up room for their opposition’s big inning – and their opposition is usually USCG.
Yesterday was no different as B&E surrendered a 13 run inning in the bottom of the 5th and fell to USCG (2-0) 16-11.
The Bombers looked like themselves in the first inning, taking advantage of mistakes and driving in runs. They plated five runners in total, highlighted by a line-drive two run homer off the bat of Steve Sartori. Sartori had the only wall-clearing home run of the day.
They resembled like themselves in fact all the way until the bottom of the 5th - strolling into the half-frame with a 10-3 lead. The heart of the order went 11-15 in building the advantage and Elisabeth Scarpa and Eric Svendsen used their speed to cause havoc on the base-paths.
“The wheels really fell off there,” outfielder Mack Patterson said. “I don’t know if we got comfortable, or if it was a lack of concentration. But we should never watch 13 runs cross the plate in a game – let a lone one inning.”
Up until the point of destruction, the Bomber defense looked air tight. On a hot and humid day the outfield managed to play the ball in front of them and get the ball back in quickly. The infield was sound and exhibited the type of range that forces B&E fans to show up in droves. The highlight of the day – and maybe the year, was a catch at short by Jason Calcano.
With runners on second and third, USCG brought up one of their top RBI men. On the second pitch of the at bat he hit a missile in between third base and short. Or so he thought. Calcano used every ounce of his enyay to lay out to his right and snare the ball about 10 inches from the ground. Both teams stopped play to simply clap and remind their lower jaw to return back to normal.
“He is just an amazing shortstop,” his boss and Bomber third baseman James Heine said. “The plays he makes in the field really save our team, and make me proud. The fact that my leadership and guidance is creating such a player is a real credit to my leadership and guidance.”
The Bombers don’t have to wait long to shake off their loss to Corporate Accounting. The squad will be back in action this afternoon against HR and Legal in Park Ridge.
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
Company Softball Deserves Ink
BABY BOMBERS REPRESENT 10-9
BY SPARKY CHALMERS
PARK RIDGE, NJ – Whoever is responsible for scripting sporting events is getting lazy, especially with their grand finales. The Bombers first game of 2010 ended in similar fashion to the championship game of 2009.
For those in attendance at last years Championship, this will be familiar (but don’t skip down).
Tied 9-9, and with one out in the bottom of the seventh inning, pitcher Ian Gold doubled through the left side of the infield. One pitch later rookie first baseman Michael Barbara hit a double to right field, letting Gold jog home to give B&E a 10-9 victory over PT in Park Ridge.
“Of course there wasn’t as much celebration as last year, but it felt great to get the win, and to get it with so many of our key pieces out made it a special game,” Gold said. “It was fun to watch new people step up.”
By now the readers of this rag have figured out that Patrice Jones and Eric Svendsen are pretty good. But without them (amongst others), in the scarlet and gray - new names and fresh faces contributed to the victory.
Barbara, holding up his end of the intern bargain, drove in the winning run of the game and used his near blinding speed for an inside the park homer to center. Elisabeth Scarpa, Brian Reilly and Dan Sandin joined Barbara as rookies of note.
On the first play of the game Scarpa tracked down a rocket hit to right field and then later had an RBI to bolster a lead in the bottom of the sixth.
Reilly, a third baseman, made the decision to forgo plastic surgery and catch a rocket line drive – and then by Scarpa’s example, contributed offensively with an inside-the-park Home Run in the sixth.
Reilly’s homer was followed by a triple from rookie outfielder Dan Sandin, who then scored the final run of the inning beating a throw home after a hit by Susan Osterlitz.
“I thought everyone played well,” Osterlitz said. “I usually measure the rookie’s worth by how quickly they bring me water between innings, but today they made the difference in the game.”
Last year the Bombers lost their first game of the year in similarly dire straits. They fell behind early and were never able to fight back and regain the lead.
Once again, B&E fell behind 0-3 after the top of the first inning – but this time no heads were hung, and they chipped away and tightened up the defense.
Gold, the pitcher who watched three PT runs just cross the plate, got the comeback started and didn’t let up until crossing the plate in the 7th. He hit home runs over the left field fence in his first two plate appearances and started off his Cy Young bid with a strong performance on the mound.
Besides for an opposite field homer in the first for PT, Gold teamed with star catcher Janine Lucas to keep a majority of PT hits in the infield and direct them at vacuum shortstop Jason Calcano (who could have been mentioned earlier and is also pretty good).
“I was mixing up signals and got into a pretty good rhythm,” Lucas said. “Slider, curve, 4-seam fastball, 2-seam fastball – yeah right, get real.”
The Bombers will be joined by the rest of their squad Monday at 5:30 when they take on familiar rivals USCG at Park Ridge.
BY SPARKY CHALMERS
PARK RIDGE, NJ – Whoever is responsible for scripting sporting events is getting lazy, especially with their grand finales. The Bombers first game of 2010 ended in similar fashion to the championship game of 2009.
For those in attendance at last years Championship, this will be familiar (but don’t skip down).
Tied 9-9, and with one out in the bottom of the seventh inning, pitcher Ian Gold doubled through the left side of the infield. One pitch later rookie first baseman Michael Barbara hit a double to right field, letting Gold jog home to give B&E a 10-9 victory over PT in Park Ridge.
“Of course there wasn’t as much celebration as last year, but it felt great to get the win, and to get it with so many of our key pieces out made it a special game,” Gold said. “It was fun to watch new people step up.”
By now the readers of this rag have figured out that Patrice Jones and Eric Svendsen are pretty good. But without them (amongst others), in the scarlet and gray - new names and fresh faces contributed to the victory.
Barbara, holding up his end of the intern bargain, drove in the winning run of the game and used his near blinding speed for an inside the park homer to center. Elisabeth Scarpa, Brian Reilly and Dan Sandin joined Barbara as rookies of note.
On the first play of the game Scarpa tracked down a rocket hit to right field and then later had an RBI to bolster a lead in the bottom of the sixth.
Reilly, a third baseman, made the decision to forgo plastic surgery and catch a rocket line drive – and then by Scarpa’s example, contributed offensively with an inside-the-park Home Run in the sixth.
Reilly’s homer was followed by a triple from rookie outfielder Dan Sandin, who then scored the final run of the inning beating a throw home after a hit by Susan Osterlitz.
“I thought everyone played well,” Osterlitz said. “I usually measure the rookie’s worth by how quickly they bring me water between innings, but today they made the difference in the game.”
Last year the Bombers lost their first game of the year in similarly dire straits. They fell behind early and were never able to fight back and regain the lead.
Once again, B&E fell behind 0-3 after the top of the first inning – but this time no heads were hung, and they chipped away and tightened up the defense.
Gold, the pitcher who watched three PT runs just cross the plate, got the comeback started and didn’t let up until crossing the plate in the 7th. He hit home runs over the left field fence in his first two plate appearances and started off his Cy Young bid with a strong performance on the mound.
Besides for an opposite field homer in the first for PT, Gold teamed with star catcher Janine Lucas to keep a majority of PT hits in the infield and direct them at vacuum shortstop Jason Calcano (who could have been mentioned earlier and is also pretty good).
“I was mixing up signals and got into a pretty good rhythm,” Lucas said. “Slider, curve, 4-seam fastball, 2-seam fastball – yeah right, get real.”
The Bombers will be joined by the rest of their squad Monday at 5:30 when they take on familiar rivals USCG at Park Ridge.
Sunday, June 13, 2010
Edgar Lee Masters (1868–1950). Spoon River Anthology. 1916.
60. Fiddler Jones
THE EARTH keeps some vibration going
There in your heart, and that is you.
And if the people find you can fiddle,
Why, fiddle you must, for all your life.
What do you see, a harvest of clover? 5
Or a meadow to walk through to the river?
The wind’s in the corn; you rub your hands
For beeves hereafter ready for market;
Or else you hear the rustle of skirts
Like the girls when dancing at Little Grove. 10
To Cooney Potter a pillar of dust
Or whirling leaves meant ruinous drouth;
They looked to me like Red-Head Sammy
Stepping it off, to “Toor-a-Loor.”
How could I till my forty acres 15
Not to speak of getting more,
With a medley of horns, bassoons and piccolos
Stirred in my brain by crows and robins
And the creak of a wind-mill—only these?
And I never started to plow in my life 20
That some one did not stop in the road
And take me away to a dance or picnic.
I ended up with forty acres;
I ended up with a broken fiddle—
And a broken laugh, and a thousand memories, 25
And not a single regret.
60. Fiddler Jones
THE EARTH keeps some vibration going
There in your heart, and that is you.
And if the people find you can fiddle,
Why, fiddle you must, for all your life.
What do you see, a harvest of clover? 5
Or a meadow to walk through to the river?
The wind’s in the corn; you rub your hands
For beeves hereafter ready for market;
Or else you hear the rustle of skirts
Like the girls when dancing at Little Grove. 10
To Cooney Potter a pillar of dust
Or whirling leaves meant ruinous drouth;
They looked to me like Red-Head Sammy
Stepping it off, to “Toor-a-Loor.”
How could I till my forty acres 15
Not to speak of getting more,
With a medley of horns, bassoons and piccolos
Stirred in my brain by crows and robins
And the creak of a wind-mill—only these?
And I never started to plow in my life 20
That some one did not stop in the road
And take me away to a dance or picnic.
I ended up with forty acres;
I ended up with a broken fiddle—
And a broken laugh, and a thousand memories, 25
And not a single regret.
I'll Start Blogging Now
For the most part I intend to wisely rant - but if you immerse yourself in my musings, you'll pick up incredible knowledge of sports, music, weekend happenings and life in general.
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